18 days of bliss

Dear Russell,

I can't believe how fast these last 18 days have gone. It has been absolutely fantastic. You have been such an easy baby and I have been having so much fun getting to know you.

We're finally at a point where we can start going places and doing things again. I tried a little too early to take everyone out of the house and ended up tiring myself out, but I think we're all ready now to resume our normal activities.

You are starting to wake up more. You will stay up for about two hours at a time. Whenever you see or hear something interesting you stare off into space with a very quizzical look on your face. It's absolutely adorable.

You don't root when you're hungry you peck my chest like a chicken. You still sleep on top of me in the recliner and probably will for a few more weeks. I wake up in the middle of the night to your head hitting the same spot on my chest over and over and you grunting. I love how you grunt. Rarely do you work yourself up into an actual cry, it's almost always a low grunt.

You really like your swing. You sit in there several times a day. We have a vibrating chair with jungle toys on it and you do not like that at all! If I am lucky you will tolerate it for a few minutes, but most of the time you just cry until I take you out and let you play with something else. When I say play, I mean sit there staring.

You make so many different faces that I can tell you want to talk and coo and smile, but you just can't make it happen yet. One of my favorite things you do is when you're upset. You move your left arm around in a very slow circle, over and over again while kicking your leg out slowly and repeatedly while you cry. I think that you think you are really moving your arms and legs, but it is so very slow I can tell it is still taking you quite a bit of effort to move your body the way you want it to move.

The other night I had to go to the Emergency Room for some post c-section issues and I was gone about 4 hours. It was the longest 4 hours ever. I kept calling and texting Daddy to see how you were doing. I could not wait to get home. That's the longest I've been away from you and I am not ready for that yet!

The two of us are starting to get into a routine at night too. You play or listen to Daddy read books for awhile, the a bath, your bottle, and finally bed. This routine has helped you sleep so well at night. You only wake up once. We're asleep for the night between 9 and 10. You wake up around 1 in the morning, and then again about 5 or 6. It's been wonderful!

I love you buddy, I can't wait to see what the next 18 days hold.
Mommy

Bringing You Home

Dear Russell,

It's been a whirl wind of a week! I have so many thoughts running through my head that I want to be sure to tell you about, but I'm on the edge of my seat, waiting for you to wake up again so I can feed and snuggle you some more! I try to put you down at least once or twice a day so that you get use to sleeping somewhere other than my chest, but it's hard for both of us to be separated even for the length of a nap.

I delivered you and your siblings by C-section. I've never been so nervous as I was with yours. I had myself so worked up over every little thing that I didn't sleep at all the night before. That was a mistake on more than one level because our delivery time got pushed from 7 am to 9 pm! That only gave me even more time to get more nervous. If only I had known then what I know now; that it was going to be one of the best experiences I've ever had.

Dr. Smith came into the room while they were prepping me, which he has never done before. He came in special just to deliver you. We were all excited because it was Dr. Smith's birthday too. The whole time they were prepping me for the spinal and administering the spinal Dr. Smith was talking, telling stories, making jokes, asking questions. It completely distracted me from what was going on and before I even knew they had started giving me the spinal, they were finished.

The delivery itself went very quickly. I got to watch them clean you off and then they brought you over to the table and I got to get such a good look at you. I even got to give you kisses before they took you back to my room.

You are perfect in every way. You have red hair, which completely thrills your brother Connor. We're 3-3 now. Daddy says we should have one more baby to break the tie!

 Our stay in the hospital was short. You were doing great and I was feeling great so we went home after the second night. You've been the easiest baby in the world. Grandma Karen hasn't even heard you cry yet! You really don't cry much at all. When you're hungry you smack your lips on your hand. It's a pretty loud smacking noise- no way to miss it! I love it.

Your siblings think you are the best thing that has ever happened to this family. They keep asking for even more babies. They want to feed, snuggle, and hold you as much as they possibly can. I've lost count of how many kisses you get in a day. They all will just run by and randomly plant one on your cheek before carrying on their way.

You had your first bath at home and you were not a huge fan. It was the fastest bath I've ever given because you were getting cold. You sure did look cute though. You have the most adorable face when you are upset. Who am I kidding, every face you make is absolutely adorable!

I can't believe it's only been 4 days. I feel like you've been a member of our family forever. I love you so much!
Mommy

Daddy

Dear Bubbas,

It could be because Father's Day is this weekend, or your Dads birthday in a couple weeks... It's possible that it's because I'm 37 weeks pregnant.... but whatever the reason I've been thinking about how fantastic your Father is lately. I probably don't tell you nearly as often as I should how wonderful he is. I should tell you every day, multiple times. Although, you probably already know.

The truth is, it's a lot easier to roll my eyes because the yard hasn't been mowed or sigh when he turns on his stupid fan for bed. But I don't want you to see me rolling my eyes and sighing at your Dad because then you aren't seeing the way I truly feel about him, which is this- He absolutely the man that I want you boys to become and Kaylee to marry. Yes, he is flawed. He's human. But he is so funny, so loving, and so wonderful. If I listed all that I love about him I would be here all night writing so I'll just tell you a few that have been on my mind the last few days.

1. Daddy spends so much time with you. He is constantly chasing you around the house, putting together your puzzles with you, spending hours playing Risk, and snuggling you. This last weekend he put up the tent in the living room so that you could pretend to have camp outs. It turns out that Hunter was too scared to sleep in the living room. Hunter wanted to be on the same floor as Mommy and Daddy, so Daddy ended up spending three nights sleeping on the the living room floor in the tent with you. He goes to all your friends birthday parties with you and enjoys them with you. He's always the one chasing all the kids at the party with silly string or water guns. Whenever he has a choice on how to spend his time, he always chooses to spend it with you.

2. Daddy takes such good care of Mommy. When Mommy and Daddy were dating he would call in sick to work if I was sick and he would sit next to me so that he could make me toast or rub my feet. We've been together for over a decade and he hasn't changed. He still comes home from work early when Mommy is sick to take care of her. Whenever I'm pregnant he goes above and beyond making sure that I have whatever I need. I literally don't have to get out of my recliner after you kids go to bed. Daddy will drop what he's doing to make me a smoothie or run to the store. He never complains and he makes me feel like he wants and loves to take care of me. 

3. He is the funniest Man alive. He makes the three of you giggle so much. I love the sounds of you playing and laughing together. Nobody can make you laugh the way Daddy can. Which makes a lot of sense because nobody can make Mommy laugh the way Daddy can. He always knows when we need a good laugh too. He's notorious for helping us turn our frowns upside down.

4. Daddy could probably go the rest of his life without decorating another cookie and he wouldn't blink an eye. However, he will always sit down with Mommy and help her create masterpiece cookies. Regardless of the event they're needed for: birthday parties, school snack day, holidays, preschool graduation. He makes it look so effortless and always fixes my mistakes. Then he makes sure to tell everyone that is in ear shot that Mommy made and decorated the cookies so that all the compliments get directed my way. I try to give him credit and he just won't take it. I love the way he helps me make all your big days special.

5. Daddy is the least materialistic person I know. He doesn't care if we have furniture that is on its last leg. He doesn't mind that we don't have a lot of extra money to go on vacations or trips. He will use broken headphones for six months if he has too, which he currently is... He wants Mommy to be able to stay home and raise you and he gives up everything else to make that happen. He works so hard for our family and sacrifices so much. He reminds me daily that life isn't about "stuff" and that we have everything we need and more than we've ever wanted. You guys are what it's all about and he never forgets that.We bought him an Oregon Coast hat for Father's Day and gave it to him early because he lost his original one at the gym. We had to call Flamingo Jims in Rockaway Oregon, send them a picture of Daddy wearing the old hat, and have them send us a new hat. Daddy loved it so much. He thought it was the most thoughtful gift ever. He wants to frame the receipt. He's so easy to please. Mommy leaves him notes on the front door every now and then in the morning. He always tapes the notes up in his car he loves them so much. I love that he loves the little things like that.

6. He is flawed. I love every one of those flaws. I love how awful he is at yard work. It makes me laugh. It makes me feel better about not being able to keep up on the housework the way I want to be able to. Looking at the long grass or the overgrown bush reminds me of all the quality time we got to spend with him during the weekend. I hate the fan he insists on having on all night long, but I love the way he comes rolling over to my side of the bed to snuggle more because he's cold and the way he knows how much I hate the fan and he never forgets to turn it off when he gets up for work. He can never find anything. He forgets where he sets almost everything. For months after we move into a new place he'll ask me questions like where his underwear are or where do we keep the big spoons, but he never forgets the important things. He's always there when it counts and he always comes through when you need him.

I hope your Daddy knows how much I love him. I hope he knows how much you love him. Just in case, we should all try to show him a little more love and appreciation. He deserves it, because he sure does show us.

Love,
Mommy

Look at that face of concentration as he takes orders from Kaylee on how to decorate her cookie.

Daddy filled almost 200 water balloons all by himself for your last day of preschool!

The hat...

Tower

Dear Kaylee,

I'm still giggling about last night this morning so I thought I should tell you about it. Last night we got home from the gym and you were allowed to go downstairs and play while the boys showered for school the next day. You asked if I wanted to help you build a castle.

We sat down together and you built a castle. Every time I tried to put a block on the castle you took it right off and said, "No, that doesn't go there."

I'm pretty sure I was of no help because I kept choosing the wrong places to put the blocks. You loved your creation and were not finished by the time bed time came. I told you to pick up the blocks and put them away which was the moment you burst into tears. Through sobs I could barely make out you trying to explain to me that you weren't done with your castle yet, and that this was not a creation you were going to be able to replicate again. We agreed to let you leave your castle up over night so you could finish it in the morning.

To me it looked like blocks. To Daddy it was an amazing creation! He came downstairs after tucking everyone in and he said, "WHOA! Who built that?!" I told him how I helped build the castle. He made several comments about how great it was and then promptly got the camera to take pictures of it. I love how differently your Daddy and I see things. Hopefully, between the two of us we'll be able to catch all the important moments of your childhood, including the castles that are of such quality they can't be replicated.

I love you!
Mommy

Preschool Graduation

Dear Connor and Hunter,

You were so darn cute tonight! I can't even describe in words how you made my heart melt.

We've been building up graduation in this house for about a month now. We made special invites, reserved a room at Round Table Pizza, and marked our calendars.  You would both tease me about how you were going to sing me the song early and ruin the surprise but then you'd laugh and run away- there was no way you were actually going to ruin the surprise!

Today finally came and you were ready! Connor was up and at them first thing this morning asking if it was time yet. We went to preschool and you rehearsed with your class and as soon as I picked you up Connor ran out of the room and made sure I knew that we had to be back by 5 'o clock! We had to get haircuts on the way home, which you weren't happy about but you tolerated for your special night. You even wanted to sleep in your jeans for nap time so you could wake up ready to go.

We stopped at the store and bought flowers for you to give your teachers when they gave you your bible, which didn't work out like we planned because your teachers weren't the ones calling your names and handing out bibles, but the flowers eventually got to your teachers. You love picking out presents and surprising people.

Watching you sing was so hilarious. You are both polar opposites. Hunter was very serious. He took his time on the moves, made sure he sang loud at all the right times, and had a straight face the whole time. Connor was the little actor. Over exaggerating the moves, smiling three times the size he normally does. He even blew kisses to the crowd when the performance was over. Your songs were so cute. I could tell you had practiced a lot because you both did a fantastic job!

Kaylee was very proud. She kept telling me, "MOMMY! THERE'S MY BOYS!"

She also would whisper to cousin Kennedy, "That's my brother Connor," "That's my brother Hunter."
 
She watched all your songs, singing quietly to herself and trying to do the hand motions you were doing. She sure does think the world of you two, which only proves what outstanding big brothers you are.

We went to pizza afterwards with our family and you ran around playing the video games and teasing Uncle Stu about spankin's. Apparently, you don't just get them on your birthday anymore- graduation is a valid reason for spanks! Daddy held Uncle Stu down for a few seconds while Connor and Kaylee got some swats in, so justice was served!

You were full of energy tonight and your smiles were so big all night I'm pretty sure your cheeks hurt right now. I'm so proud of you! You've done such an excellent job in school already and you're growing up to be such wonderful boys. Thank you for such a fun night!

I love you,
Mommy

Kindergarten Orientation

Dear Connor and Hunter,

It was such an incredibly long morning. I can't even describe how many deep breaths I had to take. We were just leaving for preschool and I was telling you that I had to pick you up early because we had to go to Kindergarten Orientation today. You began asking questions instantly....

What time are you coming?
How many minutes is that?
Will we miss snack?
Will we miss play time outside?
Where is the Kindergarten?
Do we ever get to go to preschool again?
Didn't you say we were going to do Kindergarten at home?

After all the questions had been answered there was about 30 seconds of silence before the hysteria began. Connor just started bawling. Hunter started yelling at me. The conversation was happening faster than I could think, and I was really struggling to keep up with both of you. For the sake of easy reading, I'll write the statements in different colors. Connor-green, Hunter-blue, Mommy-red.

It's going to be 10 + 10 +10 + 10 + 10 +10?
What?  What's going to be 10 +10
We're just going to have to go to Kindergarten and then GO TO SLEEP! THAT'S IT!
Who said anything about going to sleep? 
That's how many minutes until you come get us? 
Come get you from where, we're going together to the orientation. 
YOU SAID WE WERE DOING SCHOOL AT HOME NEXT YEAR! 
We are, but we're going to take some classes at the school to make friends, like Karate. 
You won't pick me up, WAAAAAAAA!
Of course I'm going to pick you up. 
 WHY CAN'T YOU TEACH US KARATE?!
I DON'T KNOW KARATE! 
I dont' know anyone there. 
You'll make new friends. 
No. My friends are at preschool. 
THEN I JUST WON'T TAKE KARATE! I WANT TO HAVE SNACK! 
We'll get a snack when the orientation is over. 
NOT FROM PRESCHOOL! 
How will we know what our friends at preschool ate for snack? 
I don't know. I don't know. I DON'T KNOW! 

Finally, we were at preschool. Connor sulked into the building. Hunter stomped into the building. I warned your teachers that you were upset. A little over an hour later I picked you up to go to orientation. You seemed to be in a better mood, very relaxed. Until we got to the car. Connor spent most of the car ride to MCP just listening to Hunter yell at me. Honestly, I was in such shock I didn't really know how to handle it. 

You never think about Ashlynn. 
Honey, what about Ashlynn. 
I'll never see her again! 
We still have 4 days of preschool left, preschool graduation, and an end of the year party that you'll see Ashlynn at. 
NO! YOU JUST SAY, NO ASHLYNN!
I only said that at your birthday party because Mommy and Daddy can't afford to have a party for everyone in your class, and we feel it's best to only invite boys if the whole class can't come. 
 You never let me do anything I want. 
Would you have preferred if we didn't have a birthday party at all? 
YOU'RE CANCELING MY BIRTHDAY PARTY TOO?! 
Connor, your birthday isn't for another year, I'm talking about the one we already had. 
YOU'RE JUST GOING TO SAY NO TO ASHLYNN ALL THE TIME!
I promised you we would have an end of the year party and that we would invite Ashlynn and we're going to. I'll have Daddy make the invitations tonight and you can hand them out at school on Friday. 
I DON'T THINK YOU'LL REALLY INVITE HER. 
I SAID I WOULD AND I WILL! IF YOU KEEP THROWING THIS TANTRUM WE'LL HAVE NO PARTY! 
WAAAAA, NO PARTY NOW?! 

Finally, we arrived at the school. As we were getting out of the car Connor asked if Kaylee got to come too. I explained that Kaylee was too little and that you had to be 5 years old to go to Kindergarten and that she would stay with me. 

WAAAAAA!!!! I'm NOT too little! I'm taller see?! I grew! I want to go too! 

It took me another five mintues to talk Kaylee down and make her feel good about being three and convince her that she's going to have a great time at Preschool next year. 

Connor walked slowly into the building, Hunter stomped, Kaylee sulked, and I waddled, defeated.    
The next few minutes went pretty quick as we got on our name tags and split up. 

I didn't see you again for about 40 minutes. You two were on your scavenger hunt and Kaylee and I were learning about what subjects I need to teach you at home and what curriculum the school library already has, what we need to buy, etc. 

When we reconnected you were excited to show me that you had stars on all the spots for the scavenger hunt. You even showed me the miniature candy bar you won! When we got to the car your excitement just started spilling out. You were both excited about the Karate class. You saw kids in the class practicing their moves and you for sure want to take Karate next year. You also thought the painting class looked pretty fun. You like the area where they have lunch even though it's a bit of a walk away. Overall, you were very impressed with the school. Connor even said he thought it would be fun. I felt relieved, so relieved that you wouldn't be stressed all summer. I felt happy, incredibly happy that you were happy and that it was a good time for you. I felt irritated, almost to tears, that we had such a rough morning for nothing- WHY DON'T YOU JUST TRUST ME?! Ugh. I'm sure I did this to my mom and your kids will eventually do it to you- which actually makes me feel a little better about how the morning went, knowing it comes around full circle. 

I love you so much. I know next year is going to be full of changes, but they'll be good changes. Preschool was scary too, and we survived. We survived and we loved it. So just imagine how much fun this next adventure will be...

XOXO, 
Mommy

The last time you were both this upset at the same time... I remember being so overwhelmed I just started laughing and I went to get the camera to document the moment. You were 8 weeks old. =0)

 

She's a sweeetie pie, and a princess

Dear Kaylee,

You have been making us all laugh so much lately just by being your cute little self. You have so much personality. You sing a lot these days. You sing about what you're doing, what you're getting ready to do, and you sing all about yourself. Your most popular song goes...

"I'm a sweetie pie, and a princess, and I'm cuuuute!"

You will argue anything. Absolutely anything. If I say, "Come here cutie pie" you say "I'm not a cutie pie, I'm a sweetie pie!"

You like to say, "well actually" a lot.

You copy a lot of what you see Mommy do, which can be a good thing but there are a few things Mommy has noticed she needs to change about herself. For example, I've never had the best patience on the road with other drivers. Lately you've been saying, "C'mon guy! Ugh. Sigh. C'mon!"

You also like to let me know what color the light is. "It's green Mom. It's GREEN!"

You have your brothers wrapped around your little fingers. They will do anything for you. The other day you couldn't find your shoes and you broke down crying. Connor was trying to figure out what was wrong and so you told him through sobs that you couldn't find your shoes. He replied the same way he'd heard me reply so many times, "Kaylee you need to put your shoes in the closet so we can find them easier." This instantly made you more furious and you screamed, "JUST FIND THEM!"
Connor and Hunter both jumped up and began frantically searching for your shoes. As I was talking to you about how you need to talk nicely to people and how nobody wants to be screamed at that way Connor came bursting into the room with your shoes in hand. It's awful hard to explain to you that screaming and yelling is not the way to get what you want when your brothers jump to your every command.

You may like to argue and yell when you're frustrated but you are also the sweetest little girl in the world. I have never gotten so many random kisses as I do from you. You love your brothers something fierce too. Last week they went fishing for the entire day and it was almost too much for you to handle. You kept asking, "when are my boys going to come home?"

You had been sleeping in your own bed so well until they went fishing for the day. When they came home you would not leave their side. You crawled into bed with them and snuggled in the middle of your bigger brothers.

You think the boys are so funny. When you're playing outside I can hear them making jokes and you are just giggling like crazy, which only fuels them to make even more jokes.

You are starting to get really excited about the baby, but you are very concerned about the amount of poop the baby will produce. You keep reminding me that babies poop. I keep reminding you that babies wear diapers and so it's not going to be a big deal.

You tell me all the time that you are officially a big sister now. Two days ago you told the doctor that this baby would be a little boy, baby Rusty but the next baby would be a girl. I told you that I didn't think there would be a next baby and offered to get you a kitty in the future instead. You immediately replied, "I don't want a kitty." You're going to have so much fun with the baby. I just know you're going to be a great big sister!

You bought goggles the other day to go swimming. I'm convinced there is nothing cuter than you in your little swimsuit and your goggles. Unfortunately, I didn't have a camera when you were wearing your goggles and you are over them now so I don't know if the opportunity will arise to capture it on film, but I hope it does because it's a look I never want to forget.

You love to swim and you are pretty fearless in the water. You love to jump in the deep end and have Daddy catch you. You also love the hot tub. I think it's going to be such a fun summer this year.

I love you very much! Thanks for being such a sweetie pie, and a cutie, and a princess....

Love,
Mommy